Jackson is not a fan of the outside and he usually needs to be carried to the grass in order to do his business. He’s very good about holding it and never marks. He only uses the pee pad if we aren’t home. He’d make a perfect apartment dog, much like my Gizmo.

There are several obvious similarities between the two dogs, but that’s not surprising given their common history. Both were kept as puppy mill stud dogs, but Gizmo was in worse shape when he came to the farm. It’s hard to believe from this picture that he was ever anything but an exceptionally healthy happy dog. Gizmo was in the best shape of his young life the day he died making his death so much harder accept.

Jackson is relatively healthy with decent dog socialization skills, but he is not savvy with people. Gizmo had neither skill nor savvy and found the whole world overwhelming and terrifying. Neither had any coordination and frequently fall. They fall over things, off things and sometimes they fall while walking. Living life in a cage doesn’t give the dogs an opportunity to build muscle or develop the philosophy of equilibrium. However, some dogs, like people, are simply not athletic. My sister never made it down a set of stairs without a few bruises.

It’s difficult not to compare the two dogs and perhaps this is one of the reasons people wait before they get another dog after one dies. I love to talk about my Gizmo and I don’t think he’d mind a few loving comparisons.

I realized immediately that Jax is not Gizmo. In the first few moments I met Jax I noticed several glaring differences. I felt a mild disappointment that he was so different from Gizmo, but he’s different in the way that identical twins are different.

Jax is his own puppy and I recognized this in the first few seconds we met. I also knew I loved him, dirt and all. He was sad and pathetic needing love and understanding. He’d come home.


I have no regrets about getting Jax so soon after losing Gizmo. I even wonder if Gizmo sent Jax to help the healing. Jax is a wonderful boy who is currently curled on a blanket on the couch beside me making me feel warm and wonderful. How can I ever regret that?

Brent and I talked about the need to throw something into the big black hole of despair we have felt in the three months since Gizmo died. We thought Jax would be that light and he did make a new place in our hearts that shines gold making the darkness of Gizmo’s death a little less painful. Jackson does make the grief less black, but the light comes from its own source and we love his  brilliant soul.




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